Dogs probably thinking the same about you.Greatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:Every time the dog jumps up on the sofa he farts. Childish I know but it never fails to crack me up.
Little things in life that make you smile
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
- davids cross
- Uncle David
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
davids cross wrote:There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman...................and a chap from Pakistan.
I personally give this thread about 4 days......... :lol:
hammerdivone wrote:From page 1 of The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread, 26th January 2010 by KUMB's very own star pundit....
More worryingly...
I have no recollection at all of posting it.....
&
my judgement has deteriorated by nearly 8 more years since that prediction........
- -DL-
- Bag Man
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
I have yet another poxy sniffle, and I was in a meeting with my manger this afternoon, talking rather important bussy type stuff - when I started coughing, which was soon followed by a sneeze and a massive fart on the 'choo' part of the sneeze which I had no control over.
I find it rather amusing, as did one of my other work mates.
My manager didn't.
I find it rather amusing, as did one of my other work mates.
My manager didn't.
- ageing hammer
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Welcome to the getting on a bit club DL-DL- wrote:I have yet another poxy sniffle, and I was in a meeting with my manger this afternoon, talking rather important bussy type stuff - when I started coughing, which was soon followed by a sneeze and a massive fart on the 'choo' part of the sneeze which I had no control over.
I find it rather amusing, as did one of my other work mates.
My manager didn't.
- uptonparkhurst
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
The definition of surprise: A FART WITH A LUMP IN IT-DL- wrote:I have yet another poxy sniffle, and I was in a meeting with my manger this afternoon, talking rather important bussy type stuff - when I started coughing, which was soon followed by a sneeze and a massive fart on the 'choo' part of the sneeze which I had no control over.
I find it rather amusing, as did one of my other work mates.
My manager didn't.
- DasNutNock
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Went to the House of Vans with my daughter so she could have a skateboarding lesson. While they tought her to push and up/down the ramp, I had a bit of a session on the street park, drawing applause from the staff and kids when I landed a peach of a frontside Ollie off the transition to flat. The other dads looked on with a combination of envy and hatred, which only added to my immense satisfaction.
- DasNutNock
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Seen Been is on his way to Downing Street as we speak.jastons wrote:Sheffield United spelling their name wrong on their own calendar
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- Burnley Hammer
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
The look of wonder on my 3 year olds face as he went out in the snow for the first time.
- -DL-
- Bag Man
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Putting £1.50 in a car park machine and the money getting stuck. Give the machine a clump and £12.50 in change spews out.
- DasNutNock
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
We have 2017's winner. Nothing better than a generous vending machine, cash machine or ticket machine.-DL- wrote:Putting £1.50 in a car park machine and the money getting stuck. Give the machine a clump and £12.50 in change spews out.
- -DL-
- Bag Man
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
It gave me the hump at first as I had no more change. Gave it a whack, and 30p came out. That pissed me off even more, so gave it another wack. A £2 nugget. Despite that, I still wanted MY £1.50 back, so whacked it a few more times until it stopped plopping coins out in to the rejected coins tray.
I think I got my money back.
I'm half tempted to pop down there again tonight and give it another go considering there is no notice on it saying it's not working
I think I got my money back.
I'm half tempted to pop down there again tonight and give it another go considering there is no notice on it saying it's not working
- DasNutNock
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
I'm just amazed you found a ticket machine that accepts cash any more. Everywhere round here requires you to spend at least 15 minutes on your phone on the verge of tears trying to give an automated voice your card number & registration. On a premium rate number:-DL- wrote:I'm half tempted to pop down there again tonight and give it another go considering there is no notice on it saying it's not working
"Using. Letters. And. Numbers. Tell. Us. Your. Car's. Registration."
"GK58 PPS"
"Did. You. Say R. E. 3. 5. J. K. F?"
- Johnny Byrne's Boots
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
My mate Dave says kids sometimes bung the coin return chute with some scrunched up paper or similar and return later to collect their winnings.
You're probably on some gang hitlist now.
You're probably on some gang hitlist now.
- DasNutNock
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
That is a BRILLIANT idea. Might try it in the cafeteria here.Johnny Byrne's Boots wrote:My mate Dave says kids sometimes bung the coin return chute with some scrunched up paper or similar and return later to collect their winnings.
- hammerdivone
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
This is brilliant, a graphics designer - well known for making great movie scenes - filmed his son and then added various special effects.
https://dms.licdn.com/playback/C4E00AQE ... jiAYTf-MPU
https://dms.licdn.com/playback/C4E00AQE ... jiAYTf-MPU
- S-H
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
^^ That is absolutely brilliant!
Edit: more here https://www.youtube.com/results?search_ ... +movie+kid
Edit: more here https://www.youtube.com/results?search_ ... +movie+kid
Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Dangerous. That could have been a shart.-DL- wrote:I have yet another poxy sniffle, and I was in a meeting with my manger this afternoon, talking rather important bussy type stuff - when I started coughing, which was soon followed by a sneeze and a massive fart on the 'choo' part of the sneeze which I had no control over.
I find it rather amusing, as did one of my other work mates.
My manager didn't.
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Re: Little things in life that make you smile
Few beers This afternoon , Mates Mrs is awaiting Stains train station for my mate, He just text me to say he has awoken at Waterloo :lol: