The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
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- Bag Man
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Label on my cassette tape said remove tabs to prevent Erasure. It worked I never heard a little respect ever again.
- Tenbury
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Ummmm..........What lives on the South coast and sounds like Spunky Troubles .....?....
- Sauce!
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I bought a car from Bonnie Tyler the other day. It’s not very reliable though.
Every now and then it falls apart.
It also came with a free sat nav.
The first time I used it I got lost in France.
Every now and then it falls apart.
It also came with a free sat nav.
The first time I used it I got lost in France.
- Greatest Cockney Rip Off
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Could you turn around though ?Sauce! wrote:I bought a car from Bonnie Tyler the other day. It’s not very reliable though.
Every now and then it falls apart.
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
What's blue and if it fell out a tree it would kill you?
A fridge with a denim jacket on.
A fridge with a denim jacket on.
- Sauce!
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Sauce! wrote:I bought a car from Bonnie Tyler the other day. It’s not very reliable though.
Every now and then it falls apart.
Yes, but the other day all the lights went out.Greatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:Could you turn around though ?
I don’t know what to do I’m always in the dark.
- Samba
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
jevs wrote:Far too clever for me
I knew that but only just got it..thanksGreatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:Chemical element for sodium is "Na".
- ageing hammer
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I saw the ghost of Gloria Gaynor last night.
First I was afraid then I was petrified,
First I was afraid then I was petrified,
- vietnammer
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
What 's brown and green, has 6 legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree?Greatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:What's blue and if it fell out a tree it would kill you?
A fridge with a denim jacket on.
A billiard table
- ageing hammer
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Monkeybubbles wrote:Music-related one liners required please, what have you got?
When I heard they had found a cure for dyslexia it was music to my arse.............
- Greatest Cockney Rip Off
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I picked up a Dalek hitchhiking on the A303 the other week.
When I asked him where he was headed , he said 'Exeter mate, Exeter mate'
I said i could take him as far as Taunton but that was it . . .
When I asked him where he was headed , he said 'Exeter mate, Exeter mate'
I said i could take him as far as Taunton but that was it . . .
- Dover KUMB fan
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I smashed up 2 of my Queen CDs yesterday.
I wasn't stopping there though, I thought I want to break three.
I wasn't stopping there though, I thought I want to break three.
- pablo jaye
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
My mate said he didn't understand cloning.
I said, that makes two of us.
I said, that makes two of us.
- Sauce!
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I used to go out with a girl who had a lazy eye but it didn’t last.
She had been seeing someone else the whole time.
She had been seeing someone else the whole time.
- Cockneyboy311
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Greatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:What's blue and if it fell out a tree it would kill you?
A fridge with a denim jacket on.
This really tickled me. Love it
- Barking Boy
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Did you know the original Police siren was invented in Neenargh, County Tipperary?
- ageing hammer
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
I have a conspiracy theory
Anyone on here old enough to remember that old Imperial Leather soap advert.
The one where they were wealthy and all in bathtubs on their jet.
The wife browsing a magazine says " Bermuda looks nice " and the hubby telephones the pilot and says "Simon Bermuda" and the pilot says roger that and turns the plane to go to Bermuda.
Strangely they were never seen again
Edit: I only found it
" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Anyone on here old enough to remember that old Imperial Leather soap advert.
The one where they were wealthy and all in bathtubs on their jet.
The wife browsing a magazine says " Bermuda looks nice " and the hubby telephones the pilot and says "Simon Bermuda" and the pilot says roger that and turns the plane to go to Bermuda.
Strangely they were never seen again
Edit: I only found it
" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
- Tenbury
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Re: The Non Racist Crap Joke Thread
Maybe the silly fecker mistook the Domestos for the Imperial Leather, washed his nuts, then jumped out the plane.ageing hammer wrote:I have a conspiracy theory
Strangely they were never seen again