A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby mushy on Mon Mar 26, 2018 11:21 pm

bongo wrote:This is really hard for me.

I am 60 and retired and live alone. Last year after breezing through life (although I have always been someone who worries) in the space of 3 three months had a double hernia and as a result it was discovered I may have prostate cancer and hit sixty.

At first I sort of coped and was eventually referred back to my GP for regular blood tests re the prostate which is the best I could have hoped for but in the three months between my 1st hospital appointment and the follow up I have got lower and lower. It has got to the stage where I am finding it increasingly hard to function with the smallest things sending me into panic.and depression. It has got to the stage where if there was a painless way to end it I would consider taking it (illogical I know killing yourself over something that may kill you) although I couldn't do this to my elderly parents and brother.

I have been seeing a counsellor which helps briefly but I soon sink back down. I have also seen my GP who prescribed Citalopram but I really don't want to start on this route a] because the leaflet says you may get worse before you get better which terrifies me. b] Becoming reliant on them.

I have recently joined my local David Lloyd to try Yoga and swim again ( I have always exercised which gives me a temporary lift) and try to fill the day as I tend to sit at home stewing.

I am at my wits end as to how to make things better any suggestions would be welcome ( I would add my friends and family have been brilliant but I hate have to keep loading this on them).



.

How are you getting along Mr Bongo?
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby somerset-hammer on Tue Mar 27, 2018 7:36 am

Joyeux Marteau wrote:I was doing pretty well recently but I just found out today that I have arthritis in my knees, hands, ankle and toes.

I am turning thirty seven this year.

It has got me down to say the least.

Sorry but I just needed to get this off my chest.


Nothing to apologize for mate.

If by sharing your problems on here helped you just a tiny bit, then it was well worth it.

Regarding your arthritis, a good friend of mine has it in various joints, he has taken up yoga and swims twice a week, and says it has helped him immeasurably, not just his aches and pains but his general happiness has improved as well, which has suprised him the most.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby bongo on Sun Apr 01, 2018 10:37 am

.[/quote]
How are you getting along Mr Bongo?[/quote

Thanks for asking Mushy.

Very up and down some days I feel almost normal others are just s..t.

Just got to keep going I guess
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby DrVenk on Sun Apr 01, 2018 11:31 am

Just back from a week in Amsterdam, and hooked up with an old medical friend of mine. I wanted to get a further insight into the mechanisms behind cannabis and its anti-anxiety/depression properties.

To get to the point, CBD oil has proved to be extremely effective in clinic trials, and is widely available. Vapers have are turning to CBD 'juice', and you can buy and ingest CBD oil by adding it to food/drink. CBD tea is now widely available for a lower but more regular ingestion of CBD.

I regularly provide my ex's mum with the tea and the oil as she has MS and it makes a world of difference for her in terms of pain management. And from what I can tell, it is definitely worth trying for generalised anxiety and possibly worth trying for depression if other avenues are not working so well.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Slacking student on Thu Apr 12, 2018 9:24 pm

Guys I don't know if this is okay to post but I needed to get something off my chest and can't go to anyone in person for reasons I'm about to say...

I’ve gotten myself in a situation at university with a married postdoc (she’s my supervisor). Been sleeping with her, whilst she’s been trying for a kid with her partner. Have done the same for 2 years but this situation is worse. Some girl I slept with apparently had chlamydia and may have passed it on to me. I’ve gone and been tested and I’m now awaiting the results in a few days. No idea how this is the case as I always wear protection except with the supervisor.

If they come back negative all well and good, say no more and I just breathe a huge sigh of relief. If positive I need to tell her so she can get tested. Then she has to tell her partner and I’m screwed. I love her and don’t want to hurt her and yes it maybe to late do that right now.

I’m feeling anxious, sick and completely helpless over this. It may very well have large consequences, both personally and professionally with the blow back being huge. I don’t know what to do and I’m panicking like crazy. Thankfully she’s away till next Wednesday so I get a little thinking space. I’m praying the test comes back negative because I don’t know what will happen if the other eventuality comes to fruition...at my wits end right now.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby DasNutNock on Thu Apr 12, 2018 9:27 pm

D’oh!

Basically, it’s her problem. If you’ve got knob rot, tell her, and break it off. It’s up to her to fess up to her bloke. You ought to get the **** outta there ASAP.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby somerset-hammer on Thu Apr 12, 2018 9:44 pm

Try not to worry until you have the test results back.
If everything comes back negative, see it as a wake up call it might be the right time to call it a day.

If it's positive, time to face the music I'm afraid, you both have to deal with the consequences of your actions.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Samba on Thu Apr 12, 2018 10:08 pm

Hmm, natural to feel how dreadful that you're now feeling, SS.
That's the cost of unprotected sex, for anyone of us. I'm not preaching, btw.
The thing is, hope that it's good news. It could well be.
Using condoms will not totally stop your risk of giving or getting chlamydia but it obviously, greatly lowers the chances.
Of course, the crazy thing is, if you have got it, your supe's husband could have given it to her & SHE could have give it to YOU.
Thing that occurs to me though is, even if you're in the clear, what if your supe one day got pregnant? Would it be yours or her partners?
I know you love her dude but...she's married & trying for a kid. You're still storing up potential grief for the future. It's also not fair on the other dude. If she doesn't love him, she should leave him. The present status quo is not good news, for all involved.
I know it's not easy mate.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Slacking student on Thu Apr 12, 2018 11:01 pm

Cheers for the replies guys

@dan I wish I could and should have done a long time ago, something keeps drawing me back

@SH yeah I'm coming round to the thinking that I may end up facing the music, how much I have to lose is what is terrifying at the moment. In a choice between me and her I'm not a valuable o the department

@Samba Yeah it needs to stop, it's already caused me to require counselling for stress and anxiety. Had a pregnancy scare last month and I was planning on stopping it. That's the annoying thing we've effectively stopped and haven't had an issue for 2 years so it's just perfect timing right as we're in the process on stopping.

Going to try and get some sleep but can't see much of that happening till I find out this test result either way next week
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Samba on Thu Apr 12, 2018 11:44 pm

At the moment, there's nothing you can do about any of it, so do nothing. And that means, put it on a shelf in your mind, until you need to take it down & deal with it.
I know when people say, don't worry, it doesn't really help. It doesn't stop you worrying, & is easy for them to say!
Things are never the end of the world, until it is, the end of the world.
Things always have a way of sorting themselves out, whether we worry or not.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Hampshire Hammer on Mon Apr 16, 2018 2:50 pm

Joyeux Marteau wrote:I was doing pretty well recently but I just found out today that I have arthritis in my knees, hands, ankle and toes.

I am turning thirty seven this year.

It has got me down to say the least.

Sorry but I just needed to get this off my chest.

A lot depends on the type of Arthritis, there are some really effective treatments out there. I have a fairly rare form that attacks small joints, plus the spine, so several of my finger joints are fused or deformed and my neck doesn't turn. It started in my thirties, I had a **** GP who kept saying "oh you've just knocked yourself" so I wasn't diagnosed for years. I'm now on an excellent medicine plus exercise regularly (Pilates is good for low impact flexing).

The key thing for me is always information and feeling that I can get on top of something.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Westcliffspur on Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:21 pm

Thank you for the kind words from some Kumbers a few pages back. There have been some wonderful words of support in this thread for people who have struggled.

An update:


After being in therapy since early January I have finally managed to tell my wife all the things those monsters did to me during my school days. This disclosure was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I was also able to partially tell the extent of this abuse to my four adult children. My youngest believes it is still more the physical beatings I have therapy for.

Several weeks after telling my wife I was able to report the four individuals to the Police. The police have been incredible ever since. I gave two hours evidence at home to two female officers. I broke down several times as talking about it in the detail they require makes you feel you are 11 years old again.

I was also required to give filmed evidence. This took over three hours and once again you are required to go into the most graphic of details. I broke down half a dozen times. I am not ashamed to admit this as the memories are almost indescribable.

Last week I went to London to give two and a half hours testimony to the Truth Project. Once again VERY traumatic but if my testimony helps keep one child safer in the future it will have been worth it.

Finally, my wife was able to track one of the teachers down and report his exact address to the police. He lives only 5 minutes from our house and 13 doors down from my adult nephew and his family.

I promised my wife and the police I would not go around to batter the hell out of him or reveal his identity or his whereabouts to anyone. I will not although this was a difficult promise to make.

So, in summary, thank you to those KUMBers who reached out to an old Spurs boy. Also, thank you to KUMB for this thread which I suspect has been a lifeline
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby somerset-hammer on Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:42 pm

Westcliffspur, mate I take my hat off to you, your courage is an inspiration, hopefully your reward will come in the form of closure.

All the best going forward buddy.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Slacking student on Mon Apr 16, 2018 10:31 pm

With matters like this there are no colours WestCliff. Just humans. Hope you are okay
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby DrVenk on Tue Apr 17, 2018 1:13 am

Westcliffspur wrote:An update:


I doff my cap to you Sir. Incredible bravery. My very best to you and your loved ones.

Do keep us all updated on your wellbeing if you can :thup:
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby EvilC on Tue Apr 17, 2018 8:15 am

WS - fair play to you mate. Hang in there.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Toulouse_Iron on Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:13 am

Westcliffspur, hats off to you, Sir. Time alone cannot erase the damage that was done to you. Your actions now, all these years later, are the first and probably hardest steps towards healing those wounds. The road will be long and rocky but better than living with this trauma silently eating away at you and making you someone you weren't meant to be.
You have proved, by opening up about this, that you have the courage to change this and to be that person. You and your family deserve it mate.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby rare as rockinghorse shat on Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:23 am

Very inspiration to read, WS - I really do wish you all the best and hope all of this works out as best as it can do for you :thup:
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby Hampshire Hammer on Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:31 am

Westcliffspur wrote:An update:

Hopefully the first step in helping you put these memories to rest, confronting this person yourself would give you some short term satisfaction but nothing compared to seeing them publicly identified and their crimes being known to all.

All the best mate and remember that you have a family who love you and will support you no matter what.
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Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Postby rare as rockinghorse shat on Tue Apr 17, 2018 10:36 am

One never knows what positives to look for in such a case, but in this instance, your actions may be the start of unearthing things that may have happened to others too and start the process for their healing and justice also.
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