The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

[Adrianisournumber1]

Its amazing the amount of people i have met lately that have been diagnosed with seasonal affective disorder my one word of advice is before you go on and try anti depressants etc... try some vitamin D, in the UK especially its believed most people suffer from a lack of Vitamin D we just dont get enough sunlight in the summer months let alone the darker months, so its recommended everyone should take a vitamin d suppliment, there is also a clear link to taking Vitamin D and the improvement from SADS or the winter blues what ever people call it. I believe in America Vitamin D is put in to certain food products while in the UK small amounts are found in kids cereal.

[Puff Daddy]

How the f*** do you talk to somebody who suffers from Bi-Polar disorder ? My step daughter has it and she is a ****ing nightmare. We are chalk and cheese, I cannot open my mouth without her going into a fit of anger and rage, this is a red rag to a bull with me, so we clash, like big time. Things are OK if you say whatever it is she wants to hear, but the moment you disagree, no matter how articulately one puts it, she goes off on one and then it all starts, like World War 3. Terrible thing to say, but I think I am begining to understand, why some people resort to murdering relatives

[Mega Ron]

In all honesty Puff I think you could make the Dalai Lama angry.

[Tenbury]

How the **** do you talk to somebody who suffers from Bi-Polar disorder ? My step daughter has it and she is a ****ing nightmare. We are chalk and cheese, I cannot open my mouth without her going into a fit of anger and rage, this is a red rag to a bull with me, so we clash, like big time. Things are OK if you say whatever it is she wants to hear, but the moment you disagree, no matter how articulately one puts it, she goes off on one and then it all starts, like World War 3. Terrible thing to say, but I think I am begining to understand, why some people resort to murdering relatives

Edited instantly.

[Tenbury]

Puff, dont fret too much. Your step-daughter , as with everyone with bipolar , is 300X more likely than a 'normal ' person to take her own life , so your difficulties may well soon be over.

[mushy]

In all honesty Puff I think you could make the Dalai Lama angry.

Thats brilliant.

[The Old Man of Storr]

How the **** do you talk to somebody who suffers from Bi-Polar disorder ? My step daughter has it and she is a ****ing nightmare. We are chalk and cheese, I cannot open my mouth without her going into a fit of anger and rage, this is a red rag to a bull with me, so we clash, like big time. Things are OK if you say whatever it is she wants to hear, but the moment you disagree, no matter how articulately one puts it, she goes off on one and then it all starts, like World War 3. Terrible thing to say, but I think I am begining to understand, why some people resort to murdering relatives

Hi Puff ,
Correct me if I'm wrong and if I am wrong please forgive me - but didn't you at one time or another tell us you had been diagnosed with Aspergers ?

What people have to understand is that some people with Aspergers can sometimes fail to show empathy or sympathy to others on the autistic spectrum or in this case with Bi-Polar . So , try not to be too hard on Puff .

Puff - please try to remember she's your stepdaughter and that to be accepted as her new Dad you have to bend over backwards , you have to prove to her that you are worthy of being her Mum's new partner , you have to show double the understanding and kindness of a normal Father . It's going to be difficult but if you love your partner then you'll want the relationship with your stepdaughter to succeed too .

Take her to one side and ask her ' Where am I going wrong , can you please help me understand why I'm making you so angry because all I want to do is make you and your Mum happy ' - perhaps you could buy her a little gift [ don't forget to wrap it up ] before you approach her with this question .

Good Luck .

[mushy]

How the **** do you talk to somebody who suffers from Bi-Polar disorder ? My step daughter has it and she is a ****ing nightmare. We are chalk and cheese, I cannot open my mouth without her going into a fit of anger and rage, this is a red rag to a bull with me, so we clash, like big time. Things are OK if you say whatever it is she wants to hear, but the moment you disagree, no matter how articulately one puts it, she goes off on one and then it all starts, like World War 3. Terrible thing to say, but I think I am begining to understand, why some people resort to murdering relatives

She is the one with Bi-Polar ,not you (hopefully).
Have you ever thought that she might need someone to sound off to when she has one of her episodes?
In other words, your role in this might be just to listen and sympathise and agree without judgement and certainly without clashing.
She has a serious mental disorder and as such she needs help.
Talking therapies are often helpful for Bi-Polar sufferers.
Good luck with it all Puff.

[Puff Daddy]

Puff, dont fret too much. Your step-daughter , as with everyone with bipolar , is 300X more likely than a 'normal ' person to take her own life , so your difficulties may well soon be over.

300 times more likely, you say

[Tenbury]

As the man said:

You can hide your face behind a smile....
Wear a collar and a tie...
Live a life until you die...

But there's one thing you can't hide.......

[S-H]

But there's one thing you can't hide.......

The stench of warps mum?

[Tenbury]

Infinitely preferable.

[Mega Ron]

But there's one thing you can't hide.......

The stench of warps mum?

Hahahaha

[mushy]

The stench of warps mum?

Dont remind me.

[davids cross]

[Officer Dibble]

So i wonder is there anyway a women or man can know that if a partner they are with has a history of being around child abuse, I understand Sarah law but I believe someone on that would have been convicted of child abuse to be on it? And if not should there not be, my abuser a had already believed to have abused 5 children before he got to me he went on to abuse 3 more after me.

So i am wondering if there isn't a process should i campaign for there to be one?

Snug folk id like your advice and if you know of a process i like to hear about it, i am also chatting to NAPAC

AdeRno1

I hope that the fact we share our reports with other agencies nowadays would prevent this type of abuse being passed from one set of victims to another and another. I fear, due to the sheer volume of reports we put in (some genuine, some more arse covering, some not genuine) and the continued Govt approach of doing more with less that some will slip through.

I am back in work on Wednesday and will contact a girl I know that investigates crimes like you have described. I will ask her if she knows if there are things in place which would highlight this form of abuse.

Fair play for trying to use your experiences to prevent other people becoming victims.

[Greatest Cockney Rip Off]

AdeRno1

I hope that the fact we share our reports with other agencies nowadays would prevent this type of abuse being passed from one set of victims to another and another. I fear, due to the sheer volume of reports we put in (some genuine, some more arse covering, some not genuine) and the continued Govt approach of doing more with less that some will slip through.

I am back in work on Wednesday and will contact a girl I know that investigates crimes like you have described. I will ask her if she knows if there are things in place which would highlight this form of abuse.

Fair play for trying to use your experiences to prevent other people becoming victims.

See my post on the previous page mate.

[bristolhammerfc]

I am not usually one for sharing how I feel and I am not asking for anything but felt so low today that I needed to do something to help.

A few years ago, my mother in law remarried and moved in with her new bloke. We had just started a family moved into the house she had moved out from. We agreed to pay rent and would add an extra £500 a month to save for a mortgage. The mother in law would keep this in her account so we wouldn't spend it. We lived there for two years. Out of the blue, the mother in law stated she had to sell the house. We asked for our savings with the intention of buying it. Turns out the mother in law had spent all the money as she had an addiction to shopping which she had hidden from her new bloke. She begged us not to tell him as it would be the break up of her marriage. My wife decided she wanted to save her mum from that but wouldn't speak to her again.

We were broke and a week away from our second child and I had to go cap in hand to our local council office to ask for emergency housing. We ended up in a flat in one of the worst areas in Bristol for crime and drug abuse. My wife cried when she saw the flat we had to live in. We made the most of it though and through luck and hard work, after 10 years got ourselves in a position to rent privately in a nice area. Our credit had been ruined the first time around when all our savings had gone and we needed furniture etc. We got into debt and things spiralled.

We paid all our bills but had no credit options. We had saved around two grand and had hoped to move in July 2019. We then got offered a property for a great price (top of our limit but in a great place for kids school and work). We would need an extra 5 grand to complete and couldn't raise any money through credit.

My brother in law offered to lend us the money to move. He told us we could pay back when we got straight as he realised we were about six months off being financially able to move. The money went on the deposit and insurance, new beds for the kids who now had their own rooms and some furniture as we had only lived in a flat. We also had to pay off existing bills and some new ones such as Council Tax. It would be tight especially over Xmas but we could just about do it and pa our bills.

January 1st 2019, my brother in law rocks up and states he needs his money back. His business is in trouble and he needs the capital. We paid 2 grand back immediately and bumped some of the other bills such as water, tv licence etc. We paid our rent which is a grand and bought some food.

Saturday, with no food left in the cupboard, the tank empty in the car and being chased for outstanding bills, I used a pay day loan company. I felt I had no choice. The payments mean we are going to be on a cliff edge for the next six months and the reality is that we might just sink. We are putting on a brave face for the kids and I am assuring my wife it will be OK.

I know it won't though. On Sunday night, I hit my lowest. I was looking at my pension documents which show a death in service benefit of 100K and thinking that it would solve all their problems and set them up not to got through this again. I didn't act on it and won't but for a minute I considered it.

I have woken up today, all smiles as far as the family is concerned and packed them all off for their respective days. I am working from home and feeling like I am in a hole with the sides caving in.

I know I have to be strong for the family, but just feel really low.

Again, never one to share my feelings, but reading this thread has inspired me to try.

[S-H]

Briz, sorry to hear of your struggles mate, sharing on here is great first step though as I'm sure you're aware there are some truly brilliant people on this site who have offered words of help/support/encouragement to myself and many others.

Having read this thread for a long time, I have also seen some excellent financial advice given by the many who specialise in that field, or those who have been in your position and come out the other side.

Try to stay strong mate, and well done for sharing, I know how hard it can be.

[davids cross]

Hats off Bris...

That sounded difficult for you to type out.

You're old school clearly. Stiff upper lip, keep it all inside, like many of (dare I say it)...our age.

Believe me, it won't solve the financial problems at a stroke but you need to start sharing your feelings. opening up. No one who cares for you would want you to be carrying this burden on your own. It's not brave.......it's damaging for you. And no one wants that.

Bris.....it sounds like you are exhausted. You have done so much, for so long, under some difficult circumstances. And this is tipping you over a mental cliff.

You deserve better....you deserve help. It sounds like you you haven't shared this with anyone, even your wife ?

And your kids ? .....Do you think, they think, they would be better off without you .
Course not.

I lost my dad at seven from cancer. I feel cheated. Don't cheat them......I know you won't but that you even had a second to think it, well, that's a cry for help......just like your post.

I think this will be hard for you, I'm not sure.........but you need to start with your GP. They can be very helpful in these sort of things. (and suggestions on financial help and services) Get it on the record how you feel....and your problems.

They see 100s of people like you in a month.

it will be a massive emotional weight off your shoulders, just telling the problem to someone. You may well be depressed. It sounds it.

xx