What do you do?

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What do you do?

Postby -DL- on Mon Sep 04, 2017 10:05 pm

Not your job title, but what you actually do - your responsibilities, stuff like that.

Me:

Garage Supervisor in SE London and Kent for The UK's largest bus operating company, overseeing 340 drivers and a fleet of 117 buses, making sure they are allocated correctly to the right routes, in the right order. Responsible for making sure they all hit the road on time, and in a roadworthy condition so they can be part of Europe's largest public transport system - London Buses, part of The TFL Network.

Getting them ready for the morning 'run out' is solely my responsibility when working on the night shift - quite daunting when I think that hundreds of thousands of people are dependant on me doing my job properly so they can get to work, school or wherever they are going.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby bristolhammerfc on Tue Sep 05, 2017 9:06 am

Bit of an odd one but I will go with it :)

So I am a Corporate Health and Safety officer for Bristol City Council. I don't do the shops and restaurant things that's Environmental Health.

My job is to stop the Chief Executive from going to prison and protect the authority from claims against it by advising on safety practice. My day is very random at times.

The week before last I had to deal with a boat that exploded in the docks with no insurance so no one knew who paid to get it removed and what we do for other boats. I dealt with the Elbow concert on the downs, including reviewing their safety practice and giving them their permit. I had two cases of asbestos exposure that had to be dealt with by the HSE, had to go to court to defend against a chancer claiming they fell over a raised paving slab, investigated a suicide in a car park, met with MP's and Councillors over Grenfell and what we do, was on the roof of templemeads station looking at how our gull removal team work at height. In addition now the schools are back I will have to deal with the same nonsense questions over conkers, medication etc. I also look after the safety of care homes, museums, parks, scaffolders, builders, highways and all other functions. Our team has 4 full time officers and 1 part time.

I can issue enforcement orders and have the same powers as an HSE inspector.

I am also responsible for anti terrorist strategy and Civil protection and the safety of the elected Mayor.

And all that for a poxy quarter of the wage of our Chief Executive.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby hammerdivone on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:23 pm

I'll join in....

I run my own consultancy business, primarily aimed at the Automotive and Retail industries advising on how they manage and deliver their Brand globally, across Europe or locally in the UK.

This often involves taking Designers Brand Concepts and advising how they can be adapted into the business (taking that pipe dream and making it reality), how to develop the strategy, how to procure it, how to deliver it, space planning and application.

This can revolve around 2D which is things like internal and external communications, websites, digital & social media, letterheads, business cards and 3D which is physical presence like signage on buildings, furniture, fixtures and fittings.

Digital is becoming a big part of what I advise on, so understanding customer journeys, big data, interactive media, virtual reality, augmented reality and marketing are all part of the service offer.

Once delivered, or during delivery of the implementation, act as Brand Guardian which is effectively protecting the Brand image and making sure it is implemented to the corporate rules.

I work with Clients like RBS, SEAT, Nissan Europe, Honda Motor Europe and Bentley but also small businesses as well.

It's a hell of a lot more interesting than I've just made it sound!! :)
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Re: What do you do?

Postby WHU_Del on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:40 pm

Shift Station Manager at a reasonably busy railway station in North Kent.
Responsible for the safety and security of everyone that comes in during my shift, whether that's staff, contractor or passenger.
Report things that aren't working, chase up when they're not fixed, investigate things that are out of place, make sure everyone on the station has any information they need.
Absolutely NOT responsible for the actual trains, or the service, or anything related to it, like tickets.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby DasNutNock on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:41 pm

I am a technology "expert" at Virtual Desktop and Application Infrastructure, Microsoft Servers, Monitoring and Autonation, Datacenters, and I dabble in Storage and Virtualization. I work as an Architect and Operations Engineer for a big US company, and am in practise more of a general purpose IT specialist than anything else.

In real terms, I try to do as little as possible, because doing stuff just leads to things breaking and people complaining. I am brilliant at finishing projects, okay at doing them, and rubbish at starting them. I am also genuinely an expert at ITIL-aligned IT Services Management as demonstrated by the fact that I'm the only person in my department that ever follows any of the ****ing processes.

Before I started working for Americans nearly 6 years ago, I worked for a UK-based, multiple-award winning IT hosting business I helped set up, and was there 12 years. When I left I had a bit of anxiety about whether or not I'd measure up at this new place, what with the Americans being the real global experts. Within a week of joining them, I realised that the reality was some distance from my expectations.

Working for Americans made me realise that many many of them are utter phoneys and all that corporate b*llocks about "who you know" is absolutely how it works there. For every decent, honest and intelligent person I've worked with, there have been at least 5 useless, lying, fraudulent pricks. I've had conversations with c-level execs where I've hung up the phone, paused, then thought "did we actually just have that converstion?" Such was the total nonsense they spouted down the phone.

We've just been taken over again, and for the first time in a while, I think I may actually be reporting to someone with his head in the right place, but we'll see. Of the 6 bosses I've had since I joined this mob, only 1 has been my equal or superior in terms of experience, capability, ability to communicate and honesty. The other 5 were all utter chancers with varying levels of incompetence.

I don't regret leaving the Uk business, but it really skewed my perspective on expectations of how people should conduct themselves at work. Was a smallish c200 ppl company, but there was more talent and competence there than any of these mega-firms I've worked for since.
Last edited by DasNutNock on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby vmixture on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:47 pm

Im an IT contractor. Skilled in Windows Server, VMware, Cisco, SCCM and lots of other stuff. Currently contracting in the public sector which mean I am the only one doing any work.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby RichieRiv on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:57 pm

I manage a combination of 9 Business Consultants and Project Managers, who deliver highly configurable solution software to mainly banks supporting their Audit, Risk and Compliance process.

In addition to the management piece, I am also a project sponsor on active engagements, acting as the point of escalation as well as provide guidance to the team (mainly when the **** hits the fan). I also get involved in the pre-sales side, giving presentations, scoping projects, drafting Statements of Work, negotiating commercials.

Although it has been an interesting 9 months, seen plenty of global travel and really understood the mechanics of how this stuff is delivered, I do need to get to the cut and thrust of sales.

My ultimate goal is to consult on "Customer Success" or even move into the world of Life Coaching
Last edited by RichieRiv on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby Crouchend_Hammer on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:11 pm

I am a retail consultant (of sorts), with a background in consumer research.
Broadly speaking my company helps brands 'win at retail' either bricks and mortar or online.
This involves analysing consumer response (both Quantitative and Qualitatative) to understand and evaluate packaging design, POS tactics, merchandising, range management, new product testing, omnishopper strategies etc etc.
I work for an international company at their London office and manage a team of 8 and my clients include all the major FMCG manufacturers (Unilever, PepsiCo, J&J, SCJ, RB, Mondelez etc etc)
Today I was delivering a presentation on a proposed new packaging design for a popular drinks brand, Friday I will be delivering a presentation to a large food manufacturer about a proposed merchandising strategy they would like to implement in one of their categories. Probably In the office tomorrow catching up on client proposals that need writing.
It is fairly humdrum at times, and I have reached a glass ceiling, but I have known my direct boss (UK MD) for years and so can pretty much work my own hours as long as stuff gets done. In my current life-stage this is a major positive for me.
Last edited by Crouchend_Hammer on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby rare as rockinghorse shat on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:13 pm

I work in IT and marketing for a loan company.

I help oversee projects relating to SEO and AdWords, Social Media brand strategy and website development, including dealing with technical issues and arranging work with external designers & coders.
The company I work for is infuriatingly unorganised and has terrible communication which results in a series of poor decision making and leaves me highly frustrated and unmotivated on a daily basis when you try to take 3 steps forward and realise that the work you've done has done nothing but go sideways due to a change in plan.

In addition to this, I deal with basic level user management on AD and network management in the office. Technical support for users and all in house systems, dealing with fault reporting to the software development companies who run our systems and discussing fixes, updates and build development and improvements.

I feel I'm wasted on a daily basis, I want to be paid more, yet not 100% sure what I'd be worth and what I'd be cut out for in another role.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby FreeWheeling on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:21 pm

Civvy
Working with the British Army in IT
Provide anything from External LANS for field exercises including OP Toral , Op Trenton and so on
Same time provide a training domain including Battle simulation suites, VBS (reduced civvy version is ARMA)
Sounds great but most of my mundane time is spent on MS Exchange, SCCM, McAfee EPO, and that b*stard LES
When working on the good kit its a bloody great job, still trying to bring the British Army into this century, a battle that I have been having for 3 years now and still cant get through.
At the point now where I may need to move on, as I could get paid 30% more elsewhere for probably doing less
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Re: What do you do?

Postby simonpaulthomas on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:21 pm

I have to try and colour between the lines and not make any spelling mistakes. I'm getting there.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby Cambs Iron on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:50 pm

Recruitment consultant in the engineering sector with a focus on automotive and motorsport. Love my job at the minute, lots of rubbish consultant's about but I do enjoy finding people new roles. Company I work for also have a great philosophy on recruitment, no KPIs and focus on the candidates rather than the clients.

Learnt a great deal since I started 18month's ago. Knew nothing about engineering and no interest in motorsport but learning new stuff everyday. Engineering is bloody complicated!!

Love speaking to people whose brain's function differently to mine, really interesting at times. Feel like an idiot at times!!
Last edited by Cambs Iron on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby warp on Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:51 pm

it's important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. that's why i manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination.






aaaaah, you meant "who"? ...
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Re: What do you do?

Postby southbrishammer on Wed Sep 06, 2017 11:25 pm

bristolhammerfc wrote: was on the roof of templemeads station looking at how our gull removal team work at height.

I don't want to be a whistleblower, but I work next door to Temple Meads, and your gull removal team seem to work on the roof without any PPE most of the time.

Me? I do management accounting and corporate assurance stuff for a Government agency. Any more detail would send you to sleep. Hence why I find the time to watch BHFC's gull removal team all day.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby ageing hammer on Wed Sep 06, 2017 11:29 pm

Feck me nearly all IT experts no wonder you could all post a picture and laughed at me when I couldn't. :D
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Re: What do you do?

Postby Blow Bubbles on Wed Sep 06, 2017 11:47 pm

Officially my title is Senior Sales Manager. I work for the largest independent estate agent in the South East but many people don't even know it because we actually trade under different names in different areas...


What I actually do, is value houses and list them to the market and then in my specific branch I run the day to day business whilst the Branch Partner runs the money and the strategy side of things... Although most of what we do is run by head office because despite us not being a 'corporate agent' we are as close you can get!

I love my day to day interaction with the public and the staff but the changing market and introduction of 'online agents' is making it much more difficult.

I've done it for over 10 years now so like to think I know what I'm doing!
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Re: What do you do?

Postby hammer etc on Thu Sep 07, 2017 12:29 am

Can't say official secrets act.
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Re: What do you do?

Postby jevs on Thu Sep 07, 2017 5:37 am

I'm responsible, as head gardener, for day to day running and future development of Britain's largest munciple Rock garden down in sunny Brighton.

That basically means all aspects of gardening as well as overseeing volunteers, community payback and other community groups.....i do the bits i like, they do the bits i don't!!!!!

Been there 18 years now and we've turned the garden into an absolute showpiece, picking up several top awards in the past few years.

This is the facebook page i run https://www.facebook.com/PrestonRockGarden/
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Re: What do you do?

Postby delbert on Thu Sep 07, 2017 7:21 am

DL. Engineers used to do that back in the day, I used to love parking them up so close some of the fatter drivers couldn't get in their bus. :lol:

FreeWheeling wrote:When working on the good kit its a bloody great job, still trying to bring the British Army into this century, a battle that I have been having for 3 years now and still cant get through.


Good luck with that mate, the "leadership" in the army has only recently slithered into the 20th century. The best ones realise what a bollox up everything is and leave early, the ones left are usually the worse of the self serving bunch who then go on to make a bollox of it when they reach senior officer status, it's a cycle of sorts aided by a reporting system that rewards toadyism and stifles innovation.
They are the cause of a disorganisation in a constant state of change that actually makes no progress whilst tying itself up with waves of nugatory work designed mainly to create jobs for their ilk.

As you can probably tell, I work for the MoD, I fix stuff that needs fixing and inspect stuff that doesn't need inspecting, and swear a lot...........
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Re: What do you do?

Postby somerset-hammer on Thu Sep 07, 2017 7:53 am

Unofficially, run a Metal Fabrication & Welding company, pricing, purchasing, meeting clients, invoicing, debt collecting, organizing the workshop, control the CE certification, sort out the apprenticeships, factory production control.

Officially read :kumb: all day.
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