You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Dead Paul on Tue Dec 11, 2018 12:39 am

Johnny Byrne's Boots wrote:Isn't there a special circle of Hell reserved for police and prison officers who end up on the wrong side of the bars?

Or is that just in the films?


There actually really is a special circle of hell for police, prison officers and judges who end up the wrong side of the bars......... it's called the nonces wing..... or the VPU as it's official name (vulnerable prisoners unit)

Just like sex offenders, they have a choice to go on it or not.. they can go normal location and chance their arm they don't get recognised or their crime get known.. or they can go straight to the nonces wing and live among all the dirty *****..

Good prison officer mate of mine actually got sentenced to 4yrs for letting slip of who was a nonce on normal location.. he'd pay the big lumps to go and smash up the rapists and child molesterers in exchange of 12.5g of tobacco.. I actually thought fair play but the law don't agree unfortunately, he's currently on the run in Cyprus.. good luck to him I say...
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Denzil on Tue Dec 11, 2018 10:43 am

Yep, hope he doesn't get pursued too hard.
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Clacton-ammer on Tue Dec 11, 2018 1:46 pm

Interesting read Dead Paul, ty :thup:

Spent quite a bit time at Pentoville or "The Ville" as it's fondly known, plus Chelmsford visiting friends and family, wasn't a particularly pleasant experience!!!

If I was going on the run Cyprus would be high on my list 8-)
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby S-H on Tue Dec 11, 2018 2:32 pm

This thread has been an eye-opener, for sure.

Many thanks for sharing your stories, Dead Paul.
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Puff Daddy on Tue Dec 11, 2018 3:33 pm

Seen the inside of a couple. Lewes is a really grim, classic old Victorian slammer, with high walls and a stone grey interior. I used to deliver pharmaceuticals to that prison when I worked as a sales rep and delivery driver and Winchester is known as a 'Churn' prison, because they churn 'em in and they churn 'em out. That too, is a cold, very uninviting, grey old jail with miserable screws. In case anybody gets the wrong idea, I didn't serve time in either, but I spent one day in Winchester prison, a category 'B' jail, some years back, when I applied for a job as careers advisor and part of the selection process, was to spend a day shadowing one of their In custody advisors. It was a very interesting experience and I often look back on it with some affection, but I just couldn't work in that environment. Winchester prison also has a gym and serves a really mean curry if anybody is interested .
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby -DL- on Tue Dec 11, 2018 4:51 pm

I've seen the inside of a few.

Chelmford and Pentonville, the archetypal Victorian jails, with the central atrium with spurs of wings coming off them. Horrible, grim places.

Belmarsh, a horrible, clinical example of a modern prison, filled with the dregs of society, and some of the roughest officers that you could imagine. No **** taken there.

Wayland, a bit of a holiday camp if truth be told, very laid back, with some very decent officers.

Highpoint Main - also known as Knifepoint, for a very good reason.

Edmunds Hill (As it was known then) - The former Highpoint annexe - another one that was like a holiday camp.

I saw a few things, but to be honest, none of it was anything that you wouldn't see out on the street today. Last time I was in one was over 10 years ago, when there always seemed to be a good staff/inmate relationship.

Hearing the horror stories of what jails are like today, I'm sure as hell that I will never be going back.
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Dead Paul on Wed Dec 12, 2018 6:27 pm

S-H wrote:This thread has been an eye-opener, for sure.

Many thanks for sharing your stories, Dead Paul.


No probs SH, it's nice to relive old times :thup:
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Dead Paul on Wed Dec 12, 2018 6:34 pm

-DL- wrote:I've seen the inside of a few.

Chelmford and Pentonville, the archetypal Victorian jails, with the central atrium with spurs of wings coming off them. Horrible, grim places.

Belmarsh, a horrible, clinical example of a modern prison, filled with the dregs of society, and some of the roughest officers that you could imagine. No **** taken there.

Wayland, a bit of a holiday camp if truth be told, very laid back, with some very decent officers.

Highpoint Main - also known as Knifepoint, for a very good reason.

Edmunds Hill (As it was known then) - The former Highpoint annexe - another one that was like a holiday camp.

I saw a few things, but to be honest, none of it was anything that you wouldn't see out on the street today. Last time I was in one was over 10 years ago, when there always seemed to be a good staff/inmate relationship.

Hearing the horror stories of what jails are like today, I'm sure as hell that I will never be going back.


Cheers for the other sides view DL, was waiting for my old jail to appear on your list but unfortunately for me it didnt..

We had Bronson stay once, way before my time, but he released a book giving reviews of prisons like people do for hotels.. "Bedding was below par but the food was lovely. Great view onto the fields from my room." That sort of thing, kind of a trip advisor before it existed.. that's worth a read if you want a general idea of how different prisons compare.
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby FreeWheeling on Wed Dec 12, 2018 9:28 pm

spent a fair few weekends locked up in the guardhouse nick, plus a full week for one military offence , I soon learned a route through the barracks that avoided the gatehouse when coming back rat arsed
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby WHU Independent on Wed Dec 12, 2018 10:07 pm

The only jail I have been in is Dublins' Kilmainham Gaol http://kilmainhamgaolmuseum.ie/ ......as a tourist.

It's a lovely place to visit, and is impressive, especially when you find out it fell into terrible disrepair and then re built brick by brick by volunteers - and that took 30 odd years. It's a "Victorian" style prison which has housed such notables as Parnell and De Valera. I did the guided tour and it really gives a different interpretation of history which was quite frankly, eye opening.

If you ever go to Dublin, go and arrange a guided tour. Highly recommended.

http://kilmainhamgaolmuseum.ie/
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby Condorhammer on Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:27 pm

Luckily I've only spent 1 night in a station cell (more luck than judgment), after giving a particularly annoying friend of a neighbour a bit of a slap.
The bloke fronted me, then had the nerve to call the old bill after. C*** !
Luckily the CPS decided not to prosecute literally days before I was due at the local magistrates court.
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Re: You Wanna Know How I Got These Bars

Postby vietnammer on Fri Jan 11, 2019 8:25 pm

Also been on the Kilmainham tour in Dublin, fascinating as said with explanation of the 19th century prison theory (everyone visible all the time). With the locked up rebels, they don't bang the republican drum, but a lot of the facts speak for themselves.

The prison officer stuff on here is a sobering read. Think it was Dead Paul mentioned that the salary was reduced to something 12k pa. How on earth do they expect anyone to do that job for that money? Paul did mention the attraction of adrenalin though. It's not going to attract any shrinking violets I suppose.

Now, a nice muppet-y story. In junior school we produced a school 'newspaper' for a short while and went to East Ham nick to interview some coppers. They showed us into a cell, then BANG! slammed the door. They left us in there just long enough to make us anxious and start calling for help.
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