Beards

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Re: Beards

Postby RichieRiv on Sat Feb 09, 2019 11:15 pm

I haven't shave now in 2 years. I now realise how much of my life I was wasting shaving.

Once a week I run the clippers over my barnet and then my boat. Easy peasy.
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Re: Beards

Postby Hugh Jargon II on Sat Feb 09, 2019 11:42 pm

I bring bad news. Old blokes see a dashing young fella with a beard and like what they see. They then attempt to aspire to the cool dude. They then look like a geography teacher with severe halitosis.

Unless they go the whole hog...and go for the skinny jeans or turned up denim shorts as well. They then look like a nonce. Pardon?
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Re: Beards

Postby bubbles1966 on Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:50 am

3 days worth of facial growth is like unpleasantly clingy underwear. It's a horrible and sweaty feeling.

Itchy and scratchy.
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Re: Beards

Postby ageing hammer on Sun Feb 10, 2019 2:00 am

I asked my doris to do a handstand naked in front of a large mirror.

She thought it was an unusual request but was thinking along the lines of fifty shades of grey so obliged.

I then opened her legs and placed my head in between them.

She excitedly asked " what are you doing next "

I told her " I think the blokes at work were right a beard wouldn't suit me "
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Re: Beards

Postby vietnammer on Sun Feb 10, 2019 2:56 am

:lol:

There are photos of me in China with a 'full set' plus one of them 'dog ear' cold weather hats and my head looks about 3' long. Another, with them round glasses what used to be trendy, makes me look like I'm teaching the Talmud and bigging up Spurs (sorry). I'd forgotten the fact that the temporary head-minge was due to there being often only cold water to shave with. If I grew one now I'd look like a retired biker.
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Re: Beards

Postby Samba on Sun Feb 10, 2019 3:53 am

ageing hammer wrote:I asked my doris to do a handstand naked in front of a large mirror.
She thought it was an unusual request but was thinking along the lines of fifty shades of grey so obliged.
I then opened her legs and placed my head in between them.
She excitedly asked " what are you doing next "
I told her " I think the blokes at work were right a beard wouldn't suit me "

:lol:
Yes, but yours might not be ginger, ageing..
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Re: Beards

Postby Greatest Cockney Rip Off on Mon Feb 11, 2019 10:50 am

Samba wrote:Yes, but yours might not be ginger, ageing..


Oi! :x
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Re: Beards

Postby claretandblue82 on Mon Feb 11, 2019 3:56 pm

I stopped shaving since the clocks went back and said I wouldn't shave again until the clocks go forward. Got an interview next week so it's going to need a trim because it looks shaggy! The wife likes it though! :wink:
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Re: Beards

Postby warp on Mon Feb 11, 2019 4:05 pm

claretandblue82 wrote:The wife likes it though! :wink:

we know :wink:
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Re: Beards

Postby S-H on Mon Feb 11, 2019 4:06 pm

Image
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Re: Beards

Postby Ferret on Tue Feb 12, 2019 4:32 pm

will never understand why peolpe in their late teens, early twenties grow beards...whats the point of trying to look sixty before your time :lol:
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Re: Beards

Postby warp on Tue Feb 12, 2019 4:34 pm

Ferret wrote:will never understand why peolpe in their late teens, early twenties grow beards...whats the point of trying to look sixty before your time :lol:

so you can shag older birds, too.
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Re: Beards

Postby sendô on Tue Feb 12, 2019 4:41 pm

I grew my beard out about a decade ago now through sheer laziness and how rugged and handsome I looked with said beard.

I shave once a week, with the beard trimmer, if I can be bothered, and it takes 10 minutes. I then leave the stubble in the sink, which of course gets mrs sendô's engine all revved up. Grrrr.

Mega Ron wrote:Whenever I have attempted to grow a beard I've shaved after about 5 days because my face becomes too itchy.

If it gets itchy, give it a light trim, and then wash it with shampoo. Itchiness goes away.

About 4 years ago now I must have gone 6 months or so with barely shaving. My beard was top quality. Now I'm fairly closely cropped black beared with a hint of grey on the chin.
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Re: Beards

Postby Hummer_I_mean_Hammer on Tue Feb 12, 2019 5:26 pm

So how do you trim a beard?
I'd be too heavy handed with clippers and end up taking lumps out.
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Re: Beards

Postby sendô on Tue Feb 12, 2019 6:20 pm

Buy a beard trimmer. Clippers are too long.
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Re: Beards

Postby Up the Junction on Tue Feb 12, 2019 6:30 pm

Hummer_I_mean_Hammer wrote:So how do you trim a beard?

You don't. You pay someone else to.

For the last few years I've been growing mine during winter and shaving for the summer. Kind of felt obliged to once I hit the mid-40s. Didn't bother this year though - couldn't get past the itchy stage.

Am in Puff's disliked 'two tone' zone these days with plenty more grey than brown (as you can sort of see here), but hey - I liked it.

https://i.imgur.com/FMNiP8S.jpg
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Re: Beards

Postby warp on Tue Feb 12, 2019 6:40 pm

Hummer_I_mean_Hammer wrote:So how do you trim a beard?


pick a pair of good scissors and cut any hair that seems too long. not necessarily one by one.
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Re: Beards

Postby Greatest Cockney Rip Off on Tue Feb 12, 2019 9:00 pm

Up the Junction wrote:[img]


That's a baby beard mate. 8-)
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Re: Beards

Postby Samba on Tue Feb 12, 2019 11:54 pm

At first I thought it was Arni when his, 'head wasn't right'..
Up the Junction wrote:Am in Puff's disliked 'two tone' zone these days with plenty more grey than brown (as you can sort of see here), but hey - I liked it.
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Re: Beards

Postby Up the Junction on Wed Feb 13, 2019 10:00 pm

Greatest Cockney Rip Off wrote:That's a baby beard mate. 8-)

I've got a long neck...
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