WARNING: This is long, and probably not worth your while!
The circus is in real trouble. The crowds aren't coming any more, and if they can't sell out in this town, that'll be it.
The ringmaster puts up a big poster while they're setting up the Big Top, advertising for new acts.
A little while later, a chap come to see the ringmaster.
'I've got an act for you. You won't have seen anything like it in your life.'
'Really? What is it?'
'I can catch a cannonball in my teeth.'
'You mean catch a bullet?'
'No, an actual cannonball.'
'Wow. Well, if you can really do that, I'll put you on tonight.'
'You won't regret it!'
So the ringmaster gets the whole circus together, and they go on a big walk around the town, proclaiming The Man Who Will Catch A Cannonball In His Teeth! Posters go up, they've got the megaphones out, the whole lot.
An hour before showtime, the place is sold out! The press and TV are there, it's huge! The circus starts, the clowns, the trapeze, the strongman all do their bit to, well, indifference basically.
The ringmaster comes out. The lights go down and he is in the single spotlight.
'Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it's the moment you've all been waiting for! Never seen before, it is time for The Man Who Will Catch A Cannonball In His Teeth!!!'
Out comes the fella, who stands on a podium on one side of the ring. The cannon is set up on the other side.
The ringmaster gets the crowd to count down from ten...
BANG!!! goes the cannon, the ball flies across the tent and hits the fella slap bang in the mush. He falls down flat, and doesn't move. Absolutely brown bread.
Of course, there's uproar, the crowd storm out, the press and TV are all over things. Negative publicity everywhere, that's it, the circus is going to be done for.
The emergency services arrive.
The paramedics check everything, and although he's very seriously hurt, the performer isn't dead. They put him in the ambulance and take him off to hospital.
The ringmaster feels so guilty. He goes to the hospital and sits by the man's bed every day
He's there for a year, every day come rain or shine.
One day, he sees the man's little finger move. He's conscious!
Little by little, he manages to lift his hand and beckon the ringmaster over to the bed. The ringmaster gets closer, and the guy keeps beckoning. The ringmaster is eventually bent down, with his face millimetres from the patient.
Slowly, ever so slowly, the performer takes off his oxygen mask, and in the smallest, tiniest voice that the ringmaster has ever heard, says:
v
v
v
v
'Ta-da!'