The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Anything goes in The Snug, General Discussion's rebellious little brother. An off-topic den of iniquity where any subject not covered elsewhere may be discussed. Well, anything except golf, Star Wars and Arsenal.

Moderators: Gnome, last.caress, Wilko1304, Rio, bristolhammerfc, the pink palermo, chalks

Post Reply
Online
User avatar
smuts
Posts: 33745
Joined: Sun Jan 28, 2007 9:28 am
Location: East, East, East London
Has liked: 1498 likes
Total likes: 1439 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by smuts »

Wishing you well DL :thup:
User avatar
DrVenk
Posts: 3920
Joined: Thu Jan 04, 2007 8:30 pm
Location: Republic of North Essex
Has liked: 359 likes
Total likes: 467 likes

Re: A thread to discuss depression and other mental issues...

Post by DrVenk »

rare as rockinghorse shat wrote:A free online course starting 28th January

Understanding Anxiety, Depression and CBT
Improve your understanding of depression and anxiety and find out more about an effective and evidence-based treatment: CBT

LINK
Excellent find. So many people I've known have really benefited from CBT. Nice one RARS :thup:

DL - stay strong mate. My old man went through what you're going through. He had his bladder removed and with my mum I helped nurse him through post operation complications. If you ever fancy a chat via PM about it, happy to share his experiences and what we learned.
User avatar
Samba
Posts: 21811
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:36 pm
Location: David Sullivan's least favourite fluffer.
Has liked: 2484 likes
Total likes: 895 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Samba »

Clacton-ammer wrote:I appreciate it was regarding alcohol, which may help a few on here, but the really interesting part of why they chose alcohol is relevant to many on here going through tough times.
Pretty much everyone had hit rock bottom due to anxiety/depression/fears, they chose drink, but again, all had mental health problems that are seen on this thread.
Pretty much all of them are now clean, and pretty much all of them got better by talking/asking for help, I know I / many have said this before, but talking & asking for help is a strength, not a weakness, watch this program and see how people have/are recovering.
Great advice, Clackers. :thup:
I really think the causes are pretty much, all the same ones.
It's just the choice of 'help' (addiction), that varies. Although none of them really help, in the long run.
Perhaps one way would be, to replace the unhelpful addiction, with a helpful one.
mushy
Posts: 18460
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2007 3:17 pm
Location: Kumb Poster of the year 2009
Has liked: 640 likes
Total likes: 839 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by mushy »

What do you mean by a helpful addiction samba?
Its not something I have come across before.
User avatar
Rocket
Posts: 4603
Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2005 9:53 am
Location: South-East London
Total likes: 1 like

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Rocket »

mushy wrote:What do you mean by a helpful addiction samba?
Its not something I have come across before.
I assume he means being 'addicted' to something that is good for you and therapeutic, like exercise or a creative outlet.
User avatar
DasNutNock
Posts: 12302
Joined: Sat Sep 17, 2016 4:41 pm
Location: R Tape loading error, 0:1

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by DasNutNock »

mushy wrote:What do you mean by a helpful addiction samba?
Its not something I have come across before.
Jonny Wilkinson is among the most famous examples of someone using their tendency towards addiction to achieve something positive (in his instance, a World Cup winner's medal).
User avatar
The Old Man of Storr
Posts: 32777
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Lost In the Recesses Of My Mind .
Has liked: 2640 likes
Total likes: 1746 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

DasNutNock wrote:
Jonny Wilkinson is among the most famous examples of someone using their tendency towards addiction to achieve something positive (in his instance, a World Cup winner's medal).
What was Jonny Wilkinson's addiction then ?
User avatar
vietnammer
Bucky the beaver
Posts: 31658
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2002 2:31 am
Location: Those little golden birdies look at them
Has liked: 618 likes
Total likes: 578 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by vietnammer »

.
User avatar
Samba
Posts: 21811
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:36 pm
Location: David Sullivan's least favourite fluffer.
Has liked: 2484 likes
Total likes: 895 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Samba »

mushy wrote:What do you mean by a helpful addiction samba?
Its not something I have come across before.
Rocket wrote:I assume he means being 'addicted' to something that is good for you and therapeutic, like exercise or a creative outlet.
Exactly so, Rocket & Dan.
I'm not saying it's easy as addictions are SO enjoyable..or at least they start off being enjoyable; I think by the stage of addiction they have just become a necessary evil; that horrible f**king monkey, clinging on your back.
It's just an idea for people to consider; re-channelling negative, destructive energy into positive, helpful behaviour.
User avatar
DasNutNock
Posts: 12302
Joined: Sat Sep 17, 2016 4:41 pm
Location: R Tape loading error, 0:1

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by DasNutNock »

The Old Man of Storr wrote:What was Jonny Wilkinson's addiction then ?
Training.
User avatar
ereford ammer
Posts: 2653
Joined: Thu Feb 22, 2007 7:21 pm
Location: At the next level with all the malcontents
Has liked: 25 likes
Total likes: 2 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by ereford ammer »

I am keeping everything crossed for you DL.
User avatar
Rocket
Posts: 4603
Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2005 9:53 am
Location: South-East London
Total likes: 1 like

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Rocket »

Feeling ****ing down today. I've no real reason to be, I got given a permanent contract at work on Friday and I went on a date which although probably not the future Mrs Rocket was the first in a while that I've kinda enjoyed. But I just feel low. The stupid thing is I think one of the things that is exacerbating all my other feelings is that the other day I left a nice scarf which was a present last Christmas on the bus. It's really pissed me off and has heightened my feelings about the things that actually matter which are troubling me. It's such a ****ing stupid thing to allow to snowball my mood!
User avatar
-DL-
Bag Man
Posts: 30097
Joined: Fri Dec 05, 2008 7:43 am
Has liked: 837 likes
Total likes: 4952 likes
Contact:

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by -DL- »

Rocket wrote:Feeling ****ing down today. I've no real reason to be, I got given a permanent contract at work on Friday and I went on a date which although probably not the future Mrs Rocket was the first in a while that I've kinda enjoyed. But I just feel low. The stupid thing is I think one of the things that is exacerbating all my other feelings is that the other day I left a nice scarf which was a present last Christmas on the bus. It's really pissed me off and has heightened my feelings about the things that actually matter which are troubling me. It's such a ****ing stupid thing to allow to snowball my mood!
Have you contacted the operator's lost property department? Driver's do check their busses at the end of each trip, and it's probably been handed in - but it only stays in the garage for 10 days before it gets sent to Baker Street, (and will cost to get back) so get a shift on! It costs nothing to collect from the garage :thup:
User avatar
Rocket
Posts: 4603
Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2005 9:53 am
Location: South-East London
Total likes: 1 like

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Rocket »

Thanks mate. I'll give that a go. I imagine it's around someone else's neck now, hopefully they need it more than I do.
User avatar
-DL-
Bag Man
Posts: 30097
Joined: Fri Dec 05, 2008 7:43 am
Has liked: 837 likes
Total likes: 4952 likes
Contact:

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by -DL- »

Rocket wrote:Thanks mate. I'll give that a go. I imagine it's around someone else's neck now, hopefully they need it more than I do.
Honestly, people would have probably chucked it off the seat out of their way rather than nick it. :thup:
User avatar
Samba
Posts: 21811
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:36 pm
Location: David Sullivan's least favourite fluffer.
Has liked: 2484 likes
Total likes: 895 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by Samba »

Rocket wrote:Feeling ****ing down today. I've no real reason to be, I got given a permanent contract at work on Friday and I went on a date which although probably not the future Mrs Rocket was the first in a while that I've kinda enjoyed. But I just feel low. The stupid thing is I think one of the things that is exacerbating all my other feelings is that the other day I left a nice scarf which was a present last Christmas on the bus. It's really pissed me off and has heightened my feelings about the things that actually matter which are troubling me. It's such a ****ing stupid thing to allow to snowball my mood!
I HATE losing things, especially things that I like, as you did, with that scarf.
It's a good shout by DL & he should know. Fingers crossed that it's at the garage, when you go there, but as you say, someone with greater need, may now be very grateful to have it.
Of course, IF you know where it was bought AND they still make that one, you can always buy another.
As said before, Christmas started building up from probably, the beginning of October?! & then got bigger & bigger & bigger, built up into this wonderful, happy time, ahead of us....which was then over, in a bleedin' flash, as it always is. And now we're in cold, dark, gloomy, long January & probably suffering withdrawals from missing alcohol, nice food or whatever else we recently, overindulged in.
However, and you wisely touched on it, it's not losing the scarf in itself, it's that it's been more, 'the last straw', on top of other stuff in your life that has probably been there, nagging away at you, for much longer.
The scarf has just reminded you as to what's really bugging you. Not that you probably needed reminding...
mushy
Posts: 18460
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2007 3:17 pm
Location: Kumb Poster of the year 2009
Has liked: 640 likes
Total likes: 839 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by mushy »

Often when I lose.things I drive myself mad trying to find them again, even though the item I have lost is relatively worthless and easy to replace. Once found there is a mild sense of euphoria that lasts for all of ten seconds. The reward for finding the item is nowhere near worth the days of looking and worrying, nevertheless we still do it.
Worrying and looking for something is probably a trigger that reveals other anxieties that we have had buried for a while. It can also be a distraction technique for me, often if I spend my entire waking day thinking about where I have left something it means I think of nothing else. For me its probably because there is something big lurking in the background that I am procrastinating about.
User avatar
Adrianisournumber1
Posts: 1914
Joined: Fri Dec 01, 2017 11:03 am

when do coincidences stop being coincidences?

Post by Adrianisournumber1 »

I have been going through an historical abuse process, in this process I have seen some horrific things, and not only that but things that could have been prevented. I suppose my thinking is at what point does someone stop being suspected of child abuse and actual interventions begin.
So I was 2/3 years of age when I was the victim of child abuse, I was a victim of abuse by my Birth mother and her partner at the time. My birth father killed himself when I was 1 after the death of my younger brother of cot death.
The man my mum had got with had already had 3 children from his first marriage placed on a care order and they where all subjected to abuse, one was 9month old and had suffered broken bones to both arms, shoulders and legs, no convictions come from this but the child was subjected to a care order, the other two children then suffered abuse and where also placed in care, again no convictions. Before he got with my birth mother, he was again in another relationship in which the children there suffered abuse and neglect. When he got with my birth mother, we then started suffering with abuse and neglect we were placed in care and adopted, he then went on to have 3 more children with my birth mother who again where all subject to abuse and they where about to be placed in care but my mother decided to leave him and kept her 3 children.
I suppose it asks when do coincidences stop being coincidences and today would there be an intervention, would this man be known to a database, the issue is for me in all the cases I have read in regards to my abuser it reads “we believe he is the abuser” so is there a way that anyone can legally know if this man is an abuser. This man according to reports was believed to have abused 9 children, all up until the point of 1997 that I am aware off after that i am out the radar. My abuser was later convicted of raping a woman in a taxi and is serving 16years in prison for that.
So i wonder is there anyway a women or man can know that if a partner they are with has a history of being around child abuse, I understand Sarah law but I believe someone on that would have been convicted of child abuse to be on it? And if not should there not be, my abuser a had already believed to have abused 5 children before he got to me he went on to abuse 3 more after me.

So i am wondering if there isn't a process should i campaign for there to be one?

Snug folk id like your advice and if you know of a process i like to hear about it, i am also chatting to NAPAC
User avatar
Greatest Cockney Rip Off
Posts: 19295
Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2003 12:29 am
Location: The oil drum in the Garden of England
Has liked: 338 likes
Total likes: 728 likes
Contact:

Re: when do coincidences stop being coincidences?

Post by Greatest Cockney Rip Off »

Adrianisournumber1 wrote:I have been going through an historical abuse process

There is a process and you'd be surprised at the technology involved. I was part of a conference years ago and attended a seminar on some database software that we used. It was mandatory and I was dreading it as a big bore-fest. It was anything but. Companies were explaining how they used this database software. One of the success stories of this software was the Met Police and one fo their IT bods explained how they'd implemented it after the whole tragic case of Baby P in Haringey and the failing of the police and social services.

Without boring you with the tech details, there's something called "semantics" and "linked data" which is now being used to link cases of abuse, from social services, to police databases to see if there's a risk or link to abuse of children. For example, the members of a household are on a database for social services when they are assigned a case, which will flag up if any of these adults or other people at this address have previous for stuff such as drunken abuse, violent behaviour, drug abuse etc. It was made clear, that before this, there was no real network set up between social services and police. This software has now been implemented and has given both social service and police a great tool to spot the early signs of abuse of children. It's not the answer to stamping it out, but it's a great advance in spotting the signs.
User avatar
pablo jaye
Posts: 11223
Joined: Fri Mar 11, 2005 6:08 pm
Location: Somewhere massive!
Has liked: 2563 likes
Total likes: 924 likes

Re: Mental Health (free course starting 28th Jan 2019 - page 66)

Post by pablo jaye »

Rocket wrote:Feeling ****ing down today. I've no real reason to be, I got given a permanent contract at work on Friday and I went on a date which although probably not the future Mrs Rocket was the first in a while that I've kinda enjoyed. But I just feel low. The stupid thing is I think one of the things that is exacerbating all my other feelings is that the other day I left a nice scarf which was a present last Christmas on the bus. It's really pissed me off and has heightened my feelings about the things that actually matter which are troubling me. It's such a ****ing stupid thing to allow to snowball my mood!
Samba wrote:And now we're in cold, dark, gloomy, long January & probably suffering withdrawals from missing alcohol, nice food or whatever else we recently, overindulged in.
Over the years, I have found something that has really helped me get through the grim months of winter - however, I would hasten to add that it is not something that leads to prolonged low moods, more a case of the occasional ‘yeuch, when will this bloody awful weather end?!’

It is the sight of snowdrops, crocuses, daffodils poking their heads out of the ground. The first buds on trees and plants making an appearance, and the first chirps of early morning birdsong - all of these are a reminder that spring is just around the corner and that warmer, brighter days are to come.

That really does give me a lift.
Post Reply