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Now the mascots have a go!


Filed: Wednesday, 1st April 2009
By: A Different Staff Writer


Sheffield United's matchday mascots are the latest group to try to make money out of West Ham United in the wake of the so-called Tevez affair.

A group of angry parents have banded together to try to sue the club for the “disappointment and distress” caused by their offspring having to lead out their club against Championship opponents rather than Premiership clubs.

Eric Higginthorpe, chairman of the Justice For Mascots pressure group commented, “I promised my lad he’d be able to lead (the) lads out against Man Utd, which is his other team. Imagine the poor lad’s disappointment when he ended up walking out alongside some nobodies from Crystal Palace. If that Lord Griffiths says that Tevez was responsible that’s good enough for us.”

Another disgruntled father said: “ I saved for weeks for my lad to be a mascot. It was going to be the proudest day of my life - his too, possibly. We went for an away match and were hoping for somewhere like Anfield or Old Trafford. Instead all we got was a trip up the road to Oakwell to watch Barnsley forwards feigning injury. No 10 year-old should have to watch that sort of thing.”

No figures have been released by JFM as yet though solicitor Ian Firth of Yorkshire firm Raleys commented: “We’d be looking for damage claims for hurt feelings and playground-related trauma to run into the thousands for each individual case. We’ll be working hard with our claims partners Zuko Legal to press for a just settlement for all the little children who have been affected by West Ham’s flagrant breach of transfer regulations.

"Maybe if we can make just one Premiership club think again about the wider consequences of illegal transfer activities, and spare one child from having to be a mascot against Derby County it will all have been worthwhile – though if not the money will at least soften the blow”.

More comment on this as it comes in.



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Your Comments


by Cockney Wideboy
02:18PM 2nd Apr 2009
''Who would you rather be right now; a Blade - or one of the really sad soppy sacks who have obviously believed this story and commented seriously on it? I mean really - obviously you weren't in control of the family brain cell when you read this. In fact it's dangerous for you to have use of a computer. Step away from the keyboard and sit there quietly dribbling.''

by '64 '75 '80
01:13PM 2nd Apr 2009
'''Instead all we got was a trip up the road to Oakwell to watch Barnsley forwards feigning injury.'

Love that little dig put in there!''

by aLAN sMITH
04:23PM 1st Apr 2009
''On a serious note, I have not as yet seen any official announcement of how much 'compensation' has to be paid or when, which I find somewhat curious. I can't help thinking that all of the conjecture regarding the sums rumoured are just that, conjecture. Also my scant legal knoweldge may seem a little over scant at this point but to my knowledge no one else has yet claimed a penny despite the endless reports in the tabloids and online media. May I offer an opion as to why. Any compensation paid to Sheffield United will be for loss of earnings due to relegation. Well those earings would have paid such things as salaries etc so Neil Warnock and the ex players would be left with the unconfortable position of suing SUFC for loss of wages that SUFC have received from WHUC! Otherwise WHUFC will be asked to pay twice when even once was a nonsense. ''

by Steve Page
12:31PM 1st Apr 2009
''Nice gag, but let's hope that it doesn't give the spongers any more ideas!''

by Tony
10:43AM 1st Apr 2009
''West Ham sign Tevez on loan for the rest of the season...''

by Won't be fooled
09:57AM 1st Apr 2009
''Ha ha, April Fools!''

by Sam
07:34AM 1st Apr 2009
''This has to be an April Fool? ''

by Lil Faroop
06:54AM 1st Apr 2009
''As a member of Justice For Mascots I wish I could say that this is just a 'a poor silly fad' but I can promise you that it's not.

As a single mum of 8 children I believe I am due some compensation from West Ham as 6 of my children are mascots at Sheffield United and having to console these broken and devastated kids has put a great strain on myself and their dads. Can you imagine the disappointment felt when they were told that they would not be leading the Blades out against Hull and Stoke?

As you well know West Ham only stayed up at the expense of Sheffield United because you played Carlos Tevez, an in-eligible player who scored loads of goals and single handedly won loads of games. As you also well know an offence of this sort should result in the punishment of at least 3 points being deducted.

So cough up West Ham. You can't give my kids their big day against Stoke but you can compensate them for the psychological trauma they have suffered. ''

by paddy harris
06:43AM 1st Apr 2009
''Well I thought I had heard it all - how wrong can I be?

If these northerners think they have a case then go ahead and be a laughing stock in court - the lawyers dont care, they are in it for the money. Why shouldn't they, they will take any idiot's dosh.

To think that responsible parents of these poor Championship supporting children could stoop so low, a snake's belly springs to mind, have even gone below the Warnock syndrome. Also if the second PL/ FA enquiry finds there is no case to answer, and Tevez was registered ok to play on then God help everyone involved. West Ham will take them to the cleaners, so pigs with their noses in the trough.''

by Nick
03:35AM 1st Apr 2009
''I'm outraged by this.... what next? Hold on... it is April Fools Day, right?''

by John White
01:12AM 1st Apr 2009
''Who's next? Let me guess, it will be a dog who got kicked when Sheffield got relegated.''

by IndoSteve
01:02AM 1st Apr 2009
''April Fool?''

by Michael
12:29AM 1st Apr 2009
''Nice April Fool's joke.''

by cookaboy
12:25AM 1st Apr 2009
''Nice April Fool, wouldn't put it past them though.''

by Muggins
12:13AM 1st Apr 2009
''-) nice one''

by Johnny Foriegner
11:50PM 31st Mar 2009
''I have a great idea, why don't all the supporters, staff, players and lawyers of of all the teams that finished ABOVE West Ham that season sue their own clubs for denying them a money grabbing opportunity and subsequent substantial windfall?

You PAID for your son to be a Sheffield United Mascot? 'A fool and his money are easily parted.'

Why didn't any of our lawyers in the trial show that our points per game ratio prior to Tevez (One win, one draw, one loss in 3 games that is 1.333 points per game) was actually better than the points per game ratio after he joined (based on our pre Tevez points ratio we should have finished on 50pts!). Can I sue our lawyers now?''

by matt
11:33PM 31st Mar 2009
''April Fools :o)''

by Richard Davies
11:28PM 31st Mar 2009
''Nice one.''

by Hayden
11:22PM 31st Mar 2009
''It says posted March 31st - that's just cheating.''

by paulo
11:16PM 31st Mar 2009
''I am so outraged now. I just can not contain my... Oh, yes very good, as you were.''

by Neil Worncock
11:12PM 31st Mar 2009
''Ha ha ha. Quality.''

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